curiousillusion

  • Twitter - sweet twitter. It's just one big chat room, and its changed my life. When something happens, I instantly grab my phone and tweet it.
    .-= Katie´s last blog ..Jesus Returns =-.
  • Me too! It's not fun if you can't share it with twitter!
  • Henry
    Well, I'm glad you saw what it's like to be around someone who pays more attention to their cell phone / tweets / text messages than they do the person they are with. In my opinion, it's no different than eyeing the girl walking by while you're on a date.. Not many people would argue that doing that is rude and creepy - and eyeing your cell is not much better.

    Another pet peeve is people who refuse to hang the hell up while they are at the counter ordering lunch, or checking out at the grocery store... Unless you are on the line with 911, hang up and call back - or don't be surprised when the checkout girl "gets all rude.." and throws your change at you.
  • Yeah, it put me in my place. :( I have to say though, I'm a horrible people watcher so that's probably not the best analogy.. because that's what I would be doing. Erm, not eyeing girls but eyeing everyone, lol!

    Yeah, I always feel guilty when I'm stuck on the phone at a place like that. I'm like, "I have to go... no I REALLY have to go...". Rawr!
  • Well, obviously I have had some issues with things coming back to bite me but you know what I figured out....it's not my problem it is her's/theirs so for me personally I'm not all that concerned with what I put out there. The whole reason I started to blog and twitter was to find new people I could connect with ... I have no problem putting it all out there for the world to see because that is just me. If I wanted it to be private I wouldn't tweet or blog about it! (and there is plenty I don't tweet and blog!)
    I totally agree with you about the facebook thing. Everyone on my facebook are people I know from school, work or my family. I only actually "know" 3 people on twitter, and I love it!
    .-= Kathleen´s last blog ..365/22 =-.
  • Exactly, definitely not your problem. In fact, I will address that in part 2. :)

    And I'm the same way, I don't "know" very many people on twitter, but I think I prefer it that way.
  • C-Towner
    I think the whole social networking thing is interesting. People are worried about putting their info out there to be stolen by someone, or used against them. A lot of people feel they have no control over whether or not it can be used, when they could just not post the info in the first place. I guess I dont care about putting my info out there because I cannot bring to mind anyone I know or have heard of that had crucial information stolen from facebook or the like.

    I also think its funny that most people dont even think about why sites like myspace and facebook exist, and why all that they offer is free. Its all about data mining to use for targeted advertising! You enter your age, location, etcetera, and you are providing demographic information to see ads that are specifically targeted to your age group, location, income level, and so on. I am in advertising, have no problems with that, and find it utterly fascinating. Most people dont even realize it!

    Anyways, as for what info I put out there, I have my real name, city, school, all that even my email and phone number on facebook. I have never received a spam phonecall or spam email since joining a couple of years ago. I just dont post information that could be used against me, like my social security number or bank account number!

    I am pretty laid back, so I am not worrying about someone stalking me, I dont think I am popular enough to be stalked, lol.

    I dont have a lot of pictures of myself on my flickr account, since I suck at SPs, and I dont think I am crazy beautiful enough to warrant a lot of pictures anyways.

    I have a myspace page that I made, but I never put anything on it, I just made it so my wife could link me on her page!

    If I had a smartphone and a data plan for web browsing, I might tweet, but as of right now, you would get like one tweet at 6am, and one at 7pm, and thats it!

    Okay, this is enough ranting for now. (/rant)
  • Okay I didn't really think about the whole advertising aspect. That's interesting. But... do people even click on the ads on Facebook, etc? I never do...

    You do know that you don't need a smart phone or web browsing phone for twitter, right? You can send or even receive tweets via text message. I'm just saying...

    I don't know that I'm worried about stalkers... I think I'm just worried about my work or future employers having issue with what I've posted?
  • Nicolle
    That was supposed to say 140 characters!! :P
  • Ha ha, I got it, no worries! Man it'd be hard to tweet in only 14 characters! 140 is hard enough as it is!
  • Nicolle
    Great blog!! I am a little sensitive to the whole "social networking" thing because of some things that have happened to me in the past on Myspace. I am a very private person & I prefer not to share my "real" self with anyone except my family & friends around me. I deleted my Myspace page last year after privacy issues with co-workers & family members. I joined Facebook around a year and a half ago, but I rarely get on there. Facebook terrifies me because I have been contacted by people I went to school with and now I don't know how to get rid of them!! LOL...I didn't keep in touch after graduation for a reason and I sure as hell don't want to talk to them now!! Twitter has allowed me to communicate with different people in a "short & sweet" kind of way. You can't really say too much in 14 characters. Or at least I can't!! It's helped me to come out of my anti-social shell a bit. I try not to share too much & just enjoy the randomness of other people. Can't wait for part 2 tomorrow!!

    P.S. It's kind of weird that you wrote about this because I was randomly thinking to myself last night when I was looking at your blog & 365 photo if Ari was your true first name or just a nickname. Now I know the answer! LOL
  • Ha ha, I know what you mean... most of my high school class is on Facebook but it's like... why are we friends now? Or rather, why do I have you as a friend on Facebook... it's not as though we communicate now, or as if we used to communicate back then!

    Ari is part of my first name, it's what my mom calls me (when she's not mad at me, ha), and my closest friends call me. When I hear my full first name, I feel like I'm in trouble, lol.
  • Wow, you've hit on a topic that I could write a novel about. Here I am, someone who happened to follow you as you were from San Antonio on Twitter as I often do to see what's going on in the city. We've had a few chats here and there and although I wouldn't say I "know you" I know enough to see your name and read it with interest.

    Me, I face a strange dilemma. Being a real estate agent, I'm all over the place. My name, my number, my email, my photo. But as a former b-list rockstar, I sometimes get frightened by that. My "leads" from my real estate site have included many former fans. My phone occasionally gets text messages from them and even the occasional phone call.

    When I first started in real estate, I struggled with whether or not to involve the rock and roll side of my life with the new real estate life. As you can guess, I decided to let the two coexist - @rerockstar was born. I have learned to let them peacefully exist together, but still keep them somewhat separate (for instance, although many people know the band, I don't discuss what band publicly).

    I am often torn, but have learned to live with having separate personalities. I didn't use my real name in the band, since I left, that person doesn't really exist much anymore.

    (Talk about asking for a split personality disorder.)
    .-= Matt Stigliano´s last blog ..Avalon Subdivision - San Antonio, TX =-.
  • Well now you've got me intrigued as to what band you were with, lol!

    I think you've got it sorted out pretty well, even if you do have to live with some form of a split personality, lol. I mean, as long as people from your band days aren't bugging you, then it's pretty sweet.
  • I used to be totally hooked on facebook but I've sort of honed my friends a bit lately so the ones I hang out with are the ones I won't hesitate to call in a heartbeat. So these days I use facebook mostly to direct people to my flickr or blog, which I think are actually more meaningful in terms of online media, I think, since my photography pretty much only lives on screens.

    I definitely agree with you about the privacy though--sometimes I hope my actual friends don't look at my flickr/twitter/blog and I definitely think it's weird to be friends on facebook with people I don't actually know.
    .-= Kira´s last blog ..Baseball Musings Part II =-.
  • Yeah I can see what you mean. Most of my friends are spread out over the world so sometimes I use Facebook just for the chat function. That's about the main use for me actually, I cant stand all those quizzes!

    And yes, I'm exactly the same way about hoping that my actual friends don't look at those things!
  • Carol
    I start by saying that I'm somewhat of a dinosaur. I'm on flickr, linkedin and facebook. I might follow a blog for a while, then drop it. I do like having contacts from other places - flickr has been great for that. I've also made some good "in person" friends because of flickr.

    But I'm not a real fan of blogging and twittering. To be honest, my life is just not that interesting that I'd write about it and I sure don't want to post a daily bitch session. I prefer to keep a more positive outlook.

    But my real objection is that it seems to take a toll on actual face-to-face social interaction. It's nearly impossible to spend an evening visiting with someone without them checking their phone, or text or whatever. I find it to be rude, as if you're not enjoying the company and would rather be talking with someone else. And unless someone's seriously bleeding, or the house is on fire, it's probably not an emergency.

    What Matt wrote is probably true - that privacy *is* gone, and I'd better get used to it. This lack is something that has been a relatively recent development in my fifty years. :)
  • You know, I actually wrote this post (and tomorrow's) with you in mind... :) I think it might have been because of your twitter comment.

    I would not call you a dinosaur at all. I believe my parents are older than you and they aren't on half the tech sites that you are on. In fact, my mom is on facebook but she has no idea what she's doing. She's like, "can you see this Ari?" It's kinda cute.

    I'll keep my thoughts on blogging for tomorrow's post... but as for what you said about taking it's toll on face-to-face interaction... I completely agree. In fact... when I was at that concert, I found myself looking at my phone quite often (before the show started, obviously)... facebook comments, emails and tweets were distracting me. It wasn't until my friend that was with me at the concert started doing the same thing, texting back friends, that I realized how annoying it was. Because it is annoying... if we're talking in person, then we should be talking, not messing with our phones as if what the other person is saying isn't important. So after that I quit looking at my phone.
  • Carol
    Gee, thanks, Ari! Glad to know my comments sparked some thoughts and were not viewed as the remarks of a crotchety old "get off my lawn" poster. :)

    I try to live "in the moment" and the constant availability of distractions such as FB and twitter rather take one away from being as fully immersed as possible. Or as Alan Cohen once wrote - if you're going to kiss, then kiss. If you're going to drive, then drive. But you can't do both at the same time and do justice to either of them!
  • GET OFF MY LAWN!

    :)
    .-= @mattstratton´s last blog ..Aggregation is the New Black =-.
  • Carol
    Bahahahahaha!

    Grrrr.
  • Ha that's a great quote! And yeah you're right about distractions...
  • i see your point, but it can also be said that all this technology helps us interact face to face better. maybe we're hanging out, and we think/talk about some crazy story from college, and i txt our old friend who lives across the country now. it involves other people — and our friend replies with a message that adds to the enjoyment we're all having now.

    and when we go out and get drunk, we don't always remember what went on the night before (even sometimes when you don't get drunk!). twittering that night's events makes revisiting things the next day even better.

    there's pros and cons, for sure. and i see your point, and it is valid. you don't want to be watching a movie with someone only to have them constantly checking their phone for txt msgs. moments like that are pretty agitating.
    .-= thisisjohnny´s last blog ..thisisjohnny: OH NO WAY does this girl's blindness go away with a blessing of holy water. you expect me to believe this, "cuidado con el angel" ? #soaps =-.
  • Carol
    If I'm out partying, the last thing I'd do would be to post it publicly. I know people drunk-dial... do they twitter while trashed, too?
  • I have been known to drunk-tweet. And to drunk-Facebook. Which bothered me when I realized it the next day, as my boss (the CTO) is my friend on Facebook. However, I think if she had noticed, she probably would have just used this as ammunition to make fun of me in our next staff meeting.

    There are advantages to this dot-com life I lead...
    .-= @mattstratton´s last blog ..Pretty pretty flowers =-.
  • Okay yeah the first part I can totally agree with... I've had those moments, where I'm talking to a friend, we decide to go hang out and we talk about someone and a couple of texts later, we're all hanging out.

    That's the good part of technology.

    The bad part would be when you're talking to a friend, about something that's really upsetting you (for instance) and your friend can't stop looking at her phone, as if her phone is more important than your crisis. Then it sucks.
  • i have not always used my real name online for various reasons, none of which dealt with safety. being an information sciences major, we were always taught, "be careful what you post online, because anyone can see it." that statement made everyone fearful, including me.

    so i had a blog in college (called "homefries and freshman girls") under an anonymous nickname only my closest friends knew, and joined the facebook site BEFORE IT WAS POPULAR, and did my things in secrecy or behind that cloak of protection of privacy controls.

    then i thought, 'why care?' if a company was going to not hire me because of something they found of me on google or whatever — a picture, a video, a blog post — then that's not a company that i want to work for anyway. would i have to walk on eggshells every day i went into the office, hoping not to say something that would offend leadership and get me terminated? besides, it didn't seem right..

    i thought, "what's the point of social media if you stay hidden behind a wall of privacy settings?" like my blog, and my twitter feed, and my yammer feed, and my facebook account.. i leave it wide open (mostly) because i want people to know me. i want people to know who i am. i want when people see me to say, "hey, i know you.."

    there's not a me and an internet me. there's not a facebook me and a twitter me. there's not a linkedin me and a blog me. it's just me. i can't separate myself. i'm crazy and random, but i'm also calculated and professional. just because i'm one thing doesn't mean i can't also be another.

    so i'm on facebook, twiiter, linkedin, have a blog, use yammer in work, and i even posted a flyer in work to say to everyone, "FOLLOW me."

    me.

    not just the internet me. not just the office me.

    but me.
    .-= thisisjohnny´s last blog ..thisisjohnny: seriously. team usa must be really angry rossi isn't playing for the red white and blue. forz' azzuri! 3-1 #italia =-.
  • Lol "before it was popular". When did it become popular? I think I was on facebook before it was popular... I remember thinking myspace was lame back when everyone loved it and joining facebook over 2 years ago. And no one would join. I barely had friends. Now... everyone is on it.

    Well, yeah I think you're right. But I don't think there's 2 different versions of me though... there is just one me. I mean, yes there's curiuosillusion, but she's not just someone I made up... she is me... and I am her. No? But there's stuff that I can share with certain people and there's stuff that I can't. Doesn't that happen in real life anyways?
  • i joined my first semester of sophomore year in college which was fall 2003. it was only open to a few select colleges at that point, and no high-schoolers were allowed, let alone the entire known universe. i was there from the start just about.

    your situation is admittedly different. it's dangerous for teachers because anything — and i mean anything — can be seen as grounds for termination. teachers have to be extra careful.
    .-= thisisjohnny´s last blog ..thisisjohnny: OH NO WAY does this girl's blindness go away with a blessing of holy water. you expect me to believe this, "cuidado con el angel" ? #soaps =-.
  • Ha ha, you WERE there from the start? That's impressive!
  • I've gone through a bit of a shift with this kind of thing, myself. For a long time, my "internet presence" was NOT based on my real name...I was "Mugsy Malone" everywhere online (well, at least since 1999; before that I was different types of usernames, although I have had mattstratton.com since the mid-90s).

    Several years ago, I decided it was time for me to "brand" myself as, well, myself. With the prevalence of social networks (such as LinkedIn) that I was using for professional reasons, it was no longer that simple to keep myself segregated - and I decided to embrace the openeness, rather than try to hide it. I took Scott McNealy's (of Sun Microsystem fame) advice to heart - "You already have zero privacy - get used to it." Which doesn't mean that I don't have any privacy - it means that I realize I cannot fight it, and instead look to how I can have it serve me rather than hinder me.

    I am always cautious about what I blog - I rarely blog anything that is work-related (this comes from the fact that up until recently, I always worked for financial firms, and it was important to not divulge any information that could link back to how our internal systems work), and I do keep in mind that everything I post or write could be seen by family members or a potential employer. I suppose I do this almost by reflex now; I have had this attitude going back to when I first started using email in 1993 - but part of that is because I have always had an "insider" look at internet and email technologies, so I know just how open and insecure that information can be, so I do not trust anything.

    As my career has progressed, especially as I work more in the dot com world, my online presence helps my career more than it hinders it. I have co-workers, customers, and vendors who all read my blog, are my friends on Facebook, and follow me on Twitter. This can cause some weird line-blurring (I had a Facebook status once where I made a comment about a girl at the gym putting her leg up on my cardio machine, and the next day one of my vendors made a reference to it while we were on a professional call), but by and large, it has not been a problem.

    The most important thing about social networking and privacy is just to have your eyes wide open. The answer is not to scurry and hide, as you will never win that battle. Figure out how to own your presence and make it work for *you*.
    .-= @mattstratton´s last blog ..Pretty pretty flowers =-.
  • My perspective on this is pretty similar to Matt's. I'm one of those people who HAS had bad experiences with social networking/blogging - my real name wasn't attached to my first blog, but my cousin knew where it was and I used to be far too open. It was a very different world ten years ago...

    Like Matt though, I now consider my online presence to be part of my "brand". As far as I know, I'm the only person with my name (at least, as far as Google is conncerned!) and as a writer and journalist I consider my ten year's blogging pedigree and social networking experience a valid selling point on my CV. Like you say below Ari, definitely our different careers are valid here - you have to be very careful not to put anything out there that could undermine your position of authority in front of students and their parents.
    .-= last year's girl´s last blog ..noone would know him if jeff buckley had lived; =-.
  • I don't even remember reading blogs 10 years ago. I don't think...

    Yeah, I definitely think different careers are the reason for my concern. Oh and btw, you're lucky that you're the only person with your name... my name isn't so ordinary, but there are at least 5 other people with it on Facebook. Shocked me when I first learned it, lol!
  • First of all... Mugsy Malone? That's awesome. And lol how funny about that facebook status.

    I think perhaps it depends on different careers. You are in a career where you can have customers and vendors be your friends on facebook, etc. Me, on the other hand... while I have co-workers on facebook, I wouldn't ever have parents of the kids I teach on there. You know what I mean?

    But you're right, I definitely try to keep an eye on what I post, and even though I have posted work-related stuff in the past, I don't think it's *too* bad. I don't think.
  • Another thing - when I first started using Facebook, I was VERY specific that I would only use it with people I knew IRL (or as we say on the Twitternet, "3D". However, over time, the lines blurred. There's a very large national scene of swing dancers, and they all use Facebook. Some of them are people I consider myself close to, even though I rarely see them in person...and some I only know from online swing discussion boards. As those people started to interact with me on Facebook, I got a little more relaxed about it.

    Now I pretty much use Facebook with ANY kind of friend...but I have some pretty hefty filtering set up, so only my real, "in person" friends can see and interact with me in the full way. Other groups (such as people from Twitter, swing dancers, old school chums, professional connections) see a subset of my information and have a restricted list of ways they can interact with me on Facebook.

    I actually wrote a whole blog post a while ago on how I set up this filtering: http://mattstratton.com/2009/01/30/how-to-rock-...

    I think that filters like that are ESSENTIAL for using Facebook in a safe and non-maddening way these days.
    .-= @mattstratton´s last blog ..Pretty pretty flowers =-.
  • That blog post of yours is REALLY helpful and they should have something like that up for people new to Facebook.

    I was really mad when I realized that my settings were not automatically set to Friends Only, because that meant that people in my networks were seeing pictures, profile info, etc that I did not want them seeing. I mean, it would have been fine but it was one ex that made me notice that what I thought was private was really not. After that I figured out how to change my privacy settings and then when my mom joined Facebook, I had to learn about filters, lol.
  • I'm completely torn. Social networks gives anyone the opportunity to share as much or little as they'd like with the world. More times than not, people share too much not realizing the consequences. Nothing on the internet is private people! If someone wants to find you, they can - not meaning to sound creepy. But I also feel like people tend to be someone other than themselves through social networking sites.

    Take me for example. I am the most social antisocial person I know. I'm definitely not as chatty, ballsy or awesome in person. My online persona, however, is everything that real-life me is not. I'm working on balancing out the two.

    Personally I don't mind using my first and last name online. My family and employers have known about my blog. I have boundaries and I work really hard not to cross them. As for the sites I'm on, I use Twitter, Facebook and 20SB the most. I have accounts on a couple others, but rarely use them. I did it to have a presence, but they don't seem as active as the three I mentioned.
  • Yeah I know what you mean... kind of. In real life I can be kind of antisocial and quiet... but in other times (mainly if I'm around people I know really well), I am spastic and talkative and bouncy... just like how I am on the internet.

    I've never heard of 20SB.. do you like it?

    I try not to use my full first and last name (even my first name that I go by is a nickname, but I prefer it IRL anyways) because... you never know, especially in my profession. Like I've said, while I don't think I've posted anything necessarily bad, I'd rather keep my personal life a bit apart from the parents of my students, for starters.
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  • And my work blogged google chat again. I'm sad now. Wonder how long til brizzly gets blocked. 1 hr ago
  • And my work apparently blocked google chat again. And I'm sad now. Wonder how long til brizzly gets blocked. Sniffle. 1 hr ago
  • Got a book from Scholastic to read to my students. Wow, it's the most depressing book ever. I might not read it to them, it makes ME sad. 2 hrs ago
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