curiousillusion

Today was quite a day. Today we had the kindergarten graduation and end of year party for our kiddos at work. And oh my goodness, wow. I had not been wanting to do a full on graduation with caps and gowns, hadn’t even wanted to do a graduation at all but since I had no choice I went along with it. And it was totally worth it. It was the cutest thing ever. Ever.

I mean, first of all to see my little ones in caps and gowns was pretty adorable. And the caps wouldn’t stay on their heads and we didn’t have bobby pins so we tried to use paper clips to get it to stay on their head but that didn’t work either. And as a result, every time they would make a big gesture or even, heck, lean forward, their hat would fall off. And then they would come up to us, in the middle of the presentation, to get us to put it back on their heads.

Then we had two administrators say a few words at the ceremony, including the principal, and I wasn’t looking forward to that… the principal didn’t strike me as a good speaker.  And I was totally shocked when they both thanked US, the teachers, and the parents and kids all cheered for us… made me feel special.

And I had to talk in front of the parents, give a little thank you, and I tried to not even think about it.. I hate talking in front of grownups. And I thanked the kids, and I thanked the parents, and I rambled for a bit.. and I got a lot of clapping and cheering and that made me feel good.

And then the kids sang some songs, and one was a goodbye song where they changed the words to include our names. And even though I didn’t catch all the words, it was enough to get me wiping my eyes. And now, whenever I hear that song, I will always think of them.

After that we had our graduation party in our classrooms and it was chaos. Mad chaos, kids were hopped up on sugar, hitting each other with balloons, parents kept pulling me aside to say thank you or get a picture with me and their child.. and then suddenly it was over and all the parents were gone. All the kids were gone. All that was left was me in my almost packed-away classroom, with cake on the floor and presents on my desk.

I’ve never felt so emotional at the end of the year, but then again, I’ve never had this group of kids OR parents. I owe a lot of it to the parents. They were pulling me aside, thanking me over and over again, and I know that I felt appreciated during Teacher Appreciation Week but wow… I feel the love now.

And that’s not to mention the flowers I got, the thank you cards, the BIG Visa gift card that I got with some money the parents got together. And some little random presents too.

Tomorrow is a half day with the kids and I’m going to be a mess, saying goodbye to them. A mess.

You may remember that I was super stressed a while back, and I’m happy to report that things are getting better. Sort of. As I was typing this, I got some not so great news and the stress levels went back up a bit. Sigh.

The biggest stress reliever is that I got called in for my end of year evaluation and next year’s contracts, finally! The evaluation went well, actually really well. The principal seemed impressed that 90% of my students were reading at least at a first grade level. Yay me! Then he promptly went on to ask how many of them were reading BEFORE they started my class.  Touche. He also seemed a bit impressed that I hadn’t missed a day of work at all this school year, and I’ve only left early once (cuz I was sick, I was quick to remind him).

Oh and yes, next year’s contracts… I have signed on for next year. SUCH a relief, you may remember that I hadn’t even applied anywhere else because I really wanted to stay at my school next year. And even though financially it’s going to be hard to move out to my own apartment, I did receive a bit of a pay increase and that will help.

One more thing about work – today was Teacher Appreciation Day. Actually, this whole week is supposed to be for us, but today’s the big day. Last year I got nothing, literally nothing. This week the parents of my students are organizing to bring me lunch every day, and I got roses today and yesterday. So sweet! Granted, it’s nothing like the garden of flowers my co-worker has on her desk, but it’s the thought that counts. :)

So that’s such a relief. Meanwhile, my brother is trying to bankrupt me… he called while I was typing this to let me know that the hotel in Italy will be $100 per person. Per night. Aka, $700 in hotel fees in Rome ALONE, for just me. And that’s not including the cost for the hotels in Venice, or the tours, or food or… *exhales* Like, I get it – this is a once in a lifetime opportunity, I may as well live it up and enjoy myself… but it’s going to be hard to enjoy myself when I’m thinking about how much this is going to cost me.

I don’t know. I went to whine to my dad and he said he’d help me out. And I know I’m going to end up owing money to my BROTHER instead of a credit card, which is so much better, and so I can just make small monthly payments to him for… well, forever, it’ll turn out. But he won’t bug me about it, he’s a good brother and won’t give me a hard time and therefore owing him a lot of money is doable. It’s just, I’m so tired of dealing with money. Or rather, not having any. It sucks.

I don’t think I’ll ever be stress free. I’m sure money will always cause me trouble. I may as well start getting used to it now.

But at least I have a job contract for next year. :)

I am exhausted. Really. This weekend seriously sucked the life out of me. And while I had a fantastic time, I’m still recovering. So since I haven’t had a chance to finish processing my pics from the weekend (and there are so many!), I will give a play-by-play of the weekend. Only cuz it makes me smile. :)

Let’s see… what was I up to?  Well Saturday I had to work, first of all. Which stinks, but I survived.  After that, I had to drive the 3 hours to San Antonio… which also stinks… but somehow it didn’t drag on like it usually does.  And then right after I got there, I had time to change into my new dress (which, btw, was super short and I’m not used to wearing super short dresses… I felt conspicuous but also, maybe a little cute :p) and then we hit the town… for a bachelorette party.

That’s right, I went to a bachelorette party this weekend, don’t be jealous. Actually, it was the first time I’ve ever been to a bachelorette party and it was quite the experience. I’m definitely not the right person to attend these things, I don’t like having attention drawn to me, and I definitely don’t like (ahem) genitalia-themed straws or cookies. I do like a good excuse for barhopping, so there’s that. :)

That said, I kind of bailed on the bachelorette party rather early. Do you remember my could’ve been guy that I wrote about? We’ve hung out every time I’ve been back to San Antonio, but this time (since he works downtown and would be done with work in the midst of our partying) I figured we could meet up and grab a few drinks.  And much to my surprise, he was up for it.  You see, lately he’s been aloof and distant, and so that’s what I expect from him. But this weekend he was the complete opposite. He actually acted like he wanted to spend time with me, as much as he possibly could.. when we were running around downtown he was holding my hand (which btw, is one of the major things I miss about having a guy – my hand feels lonely)… we were making plans on where we should travel in the future… it threw me for a loop. A nice loop though.  I’ll take it. And I guess I’ll have to hope aloof and distant him doesn’t return suddenly.

What else happened while I was out? I ended up downing a drink super fast, skipping out on a guy that I was talking to because my friend had finally arrived to pick me up, and apparently sticking him with the bill (according to the bartender…her suggestion, not mine). Later, when my friend went to the restroom and I was sitting in a rowdy club by myself, a guy came up to me and asked me why I wasn’t smiling, telling me that when he came back, I better be smiling or he’d be mad. He never came back, probably because my friend did. :p Oh but the proudest moment? I managed to maneuver around downtown, doing quite a bit of walking, from 8pm to 2am in my high heels and teeny little dress. I am officially grown up. :)

I will say, by the way, that I think I had one drink too many. Just one. But that, combined with sleeping on an air bed mattress made for quite an unbearable Sunday morning.  Oof. I may be too old for this.  You know what else I was too old for? The whole bachelorette party… all the other girls were 22 and 23, with the exception of one that was still a few years younger than me. Am I officially an old maid?  That said, I stayed out later than all of them, so there. :p

Sunday morning we took a trip to Market Square (pictures coming soon) and then I met up with Leandra. Oh and by the way, I learned that waiting outside, reading a book for an hour and a half without sunscreen is definitely a bad idea. You’d think I would’ve figured that out but it didn’t FEEL hot just warm. Perfect reading weather. And so, as a result, I am now all sorts of sunburned.  With fun tan lines from straps and where my hair was laying on my neck. You so wish you were me, I know.

After that I drove home, stopping to take some pictures of some abandoned buildings (again, pictures coming soon). And that’s it, my weekend is officially over.  I feel like I need a weekend from my weekend, it was so tiring!   Definitely fun though, every time I go back to San Antonio I have a blast. Why did I leave again?

I just had to share this because it makes me smile.

The other day I received an email from a parent of one of my students. We had been emailing each other about a few things and then she threw in something that she thought I would like to know: apparently her son told her that his favorite gum was Orbit Sweet Mint… because that’s what *I* chew.

I was floored when I read that – it totally made my day.  I’m not as big of a gum-chewer as I used to be, I started biting the inside of my cheek a few too many times and so now I only save it for the usual occasions – on a plane ride, getting rid of the coffee breath from my morning Starbucks, etc. I can’t even remember the last time I chewed gum in front of my students (must be at least a few months), and even then it’s not like I flaunted it in front of them – so for him to catch sight of the gum packaging and remember it is pretty remarkable.

And yet that’s not all.  When I was in San Antonio for the weekend, ‘Bama boy and I had grabbed something to eat and afterward I offered him some gum (cuz my mama raised me with some manners and I pretty much HAVE to offer others gum if I’m taking a piece). When he saw what I was offering him, he told me that he had been trying to look for this flavor all over Alabama but they didn’t have it. Why does that make me smile?  Because he knows about this gum from ME… when we were first met and the airplane was taking off, I offered him a piece of it.

Maybe it’s just me but that makes me smile. All of it. I think it’s adorable that a 6 year old decided it was HIS favorite because it was MY favorite and I think it’s adorable that ‘Bama boy went looking for it and said he’d have to stock up when he DOES find it. Now who knows if ‘Bama boy actually went looking for it *because* of me… maybe not. But maybe so.

I mean, I’m sure most of the credit (with ‘Bama boy anyways) goes to the gum itself. I’ve tried other gums, even other flavors of Orbit, but I always come back to the Sweet Mint flavor.  It’s just plain yummy, I’ve been chewing it for at least two years now and have yet to find anything better. But I’d like to take some of the credit, if I can.

I guess it just boils down to wanting to be remembered. I know there are sports teams and tv shows, smells and even colors that remind me of some people. I kind of think it’s neat that there’s a gum out there that two people see and think of me.  Hopefully.

The funny thing is… from now on, this gum is going to remind me of THEM. I love it. :)

I took kind of a technology break this weekend, and went back to San Antonio. I say “technology break” because I left the MacBook at home, tragically neglected my camera (even though it went everywhere with me) and met up with my friends and the guy I met when I went to Alabama. Basically, I spent two whole days living my life and having FUN, instead of documenting it to pieces. I went… well, I went everywhere. I drove so much, I was always out… (I actually kind of feel bad about the always being out part, since I didn’t spend much time with the girl who I was staying with and that made me feel guilty. Oops.) It was good times, definitely.

So in the spirit of using this blog as a way to keep track of what I’ve been up to, here are some bullet points from this weekend:

• It’s a good thing I didn’t bring the MacBook because I wouldn’t have had a spare minute to use it. And it wasn’t missed, not even a little bit, because I had such a great time.
• Remember how I got that new perfume? Yeah, ‘Bama boy (who is relocating across the country, sadly) couldn’t stop smelling me. Perfume = win.
• Being back in San Antonio made me happy and nostalgic… and also, almost made me happy I left. I get paranoid being there, like I’m going to run into an ex or something. I do really like the city though, a lot.
• Bluebonnets and other wildflowers were EVERYWHERE. Made me realize how unobservant I am, I lived there for 5 years and never noticed until this trip.
• Sunday afternoon I met some people at a bar and apparently right before I got there, there was a girl sitting there that was reading a book. That’s right. A girl, reading a book, in a bar. Sound familiar? Except apparently she wasn’t as sociable (is that a word?) as I was and I seriously question her choice of reading material (the Jennifer Love Hewitt book… seriously?!).
• Songs that I spent far too much time listening to during the trip, and will therefore always associate with this trip: “This Afternoon” by Nickelback, “Break Your Heart” by Taio Cruz, “Rude Boy” by Rihanna, and “Nothin’ On You” by B.o.B.
• I had an epiphany moment at one point and realized that I probably should cut back on my Starbucks intake, as my teeth are looking pretty dingy. And then I proceeded to visit the place twice the next day. Oops. It’s just such a convenient place to hang out with people!
• I tend to spend too much money whenever I go back to visit. On random stuff that I could totally buy back home. This time: the DVDs Whip It and The Proposal (which I had been wanting for forever and which never seem to be in stock here), Fresh Brown Sugar Scrub, a book ‘Bama boy recommended (The Long Road Home, which kind of has personal significance for him, let’s leave it at that) and random other little things.
• I had a friend tell me that I seem happy. I DO feel happy. That’s a good feeling.

That’s pretty much it, I think. I had a great time, even though I’m kinda bummed out that I probably won’t see ‘Bama boy again. I kind of WOULD like to visit where he’s moving to (and he’s hinted that I should) but I don’t think I will, only because him and I… we’re not like that. If that makes sense. It’s just that it was a fling, that’s about it and it was fun while it lasted, but all good things must come to an end (blah blah blah). I guess I’m kinda lucky though… back when I wrote about him on the blog, I mentioned thinking the chapter on him was closed… but things worked out and we actually got to see each other again, for a whole weekend. But now I think it’s *actually* closed, for good. Maybe. Sadly. Hopefully not but probably.

Ah well, at least I have some pretty sweet memories. :)

You might remember a while back that I was debating on going to a bar by myself. I was conflicted on if I SHOULD go by myself, and then everyone said it was a good idea (well, most everyone).  But since then, I hadn’t been so inclined, or I’ve had things to do.  Until Saturday night, when I finally did it – I want to a bar on my own.

It had been a long week and I just deserved a drink. Unfortunately, my friend that I usually go out with was otherwise occupied and even though she said we’d hang out later, I didn’t think it was going to happen. So I got myself all prettied up and went to the bar that I had previously been with @jamieallison. It’s more of a lounge than a bar, when we went it wasn’t very crowded (actually it was pretty empty) and it didn’t feel sleazy or anything at all.  (This time it got much more crowded, but it still didn’t feel overwhelming.)

So I did it. I went up to the bar, pulled up a chair, and ordered myself a drink.  (And then promptly wondered why I wasn’t carded because I’m ALWAYS carded.) I had planned to try not to be in the corner of the bar but unfortunately most of the seats at the bar were taken and I decided to leave the obligatory seat open in between me and this other guy already at the bar.  So I sipped my pineapple & Malibu, glanced up a few times at the TV (stupid Duke was winning), fiddled with my phone and then had one of those “now what?” moments.

This is why I had brought my book.  So I busted it out and started reading it, right at the bar. (For those who are interested, I’m reading I Know This Much Is True by Wally Lamb… I bought it randomly earlier that day when I needed a book to take to the park, plus I had previously read a book by the same author that I really liked.) Reading at the bar was… different.  I mean, I can pretty much read anywhere so that’s not the problem, I just felt like people were giving me funny looks.

Now, I had brought the book to read a) for something to keep me busy and b) because my brother thought it would be a conversation starter.  I have to say that I think conversation was started IN SPITE of my reading a book, not because of it. When the bartender asked if I was ready for another drink, I tried to make conversation and be friendly (I figured, if I come back to this bar, it’d be nice to get along with the bartenders) and mentioned being kind of hidden by some big pitcher thingys.  We talked about that for a sec, and then she brought the guy sitting near me into the conversation – he’s kind of a regular at the place and had tried the drink that was blocking my view.

And that’s when the evening got better.  I ended up spending the rest of the evening talking to that guy, eventually scooting over to the empty seat near him to talk better… and it was fun.  I had a great time, laughed a lot, as did he… and he has a great smile too. :)  And for those wondering, this guy actually LIVES in town and doesn’t seem to have any plans to move.  Just when I was starting to think that people here in town had something against me…

Now, where does the book play in all this?  I mentioned the conversation started in spite of me reading… but it did prove to be a conversation topic.  He asked what I was reading (I mean, if you saw a girl reading in a bar, wouldn’t you ask?) and even though he hadn’t heard of it, it got us talking about books – where he mentioned some books he’s trying to read. And I have to say, I love it when I hear that a guy reads books. I mean, I’m pretty picky about guys in general, but the main thing that I want is a reader.  So I guess you could say the book came in handy after all.  Maybe if I had been reading a more popular/recognizable book, things might have gone differently.

I had only expected to stay at the bar for maybe an hour but I ended up staying until it closed down.  The guy walked me to my car, asked for my number and we’ve exchanged a few texts since then. Not too shabby, eh?  I have to call that night a success.  We’ll see what happens next.

Would I go out to a bar on my own again?  Absolutely.  I’m sure I’ll still feel awkward and people will always give me funny looks for reading in a bar, but lately I’m just craving human contact.  I’m tired of being shut in my room, day in and day out, and I just want to get out there and be social, you know? Actually TALK to someone, not just online.

And hey, if I meet a cute guy as a result, I’m definitely not complaining.

Look what I got today…

Isn’t she beautiful?  Taking some getting used to, but it’s true love. :)

If anyone wants to chat with me on iChat, add me – curiousillusion (at) mac (dot) com.  I’m off to play some more!

So I have this trip planned for the summer… a friend is getting married in England and the original plan was for me to go to England for a week.  My dad forked over his frequent flier miles (poor guy didn’t really have a choice, there’s no way I could’ve afforded it on my own) and a few weeks ago my flight was booked.  That in itself is exciting, but there’s more.

You see, my brother really wanted to go somewhere while he was in Europe, he didn’t care where.  My parents and him were gonna go but then the parents bailed and my brother was all, I’ll go alone then.  And then I was told that a ticket to Italy from England wasn’t very expensive and I decided… why not?  I mean, it’s freaking Italy! And so all of a sudden, my flight has been changed and… I’m going to Italy too!!

I’m so excited, words don’t even describe.  Being in Italy, seeing the sights, TAKING THE PICTURES. My camera is drooling at the bit.  Oh wait, that’s me.  And we have plans: to take tours around Rome, Vatican City and Venice.  But I don’t even mind what we do… as I’ve said, I’m going to be in ITALY.  I’m over the moon thrilled, anything else is icing on the cake.

I will admit, I’m a bit nervous too.  I don’t speak the language at all… I’m trying to learn a bit and so far I can say hi, bye, thank you, please, excuse me and, well my favorite word is… you’re welcome (prego!  I love it… I saw the jar of Prego sauce this morning at home and had to snap a pic). I have 3 months to learn as much as I can.  The other part that I’m nervous about is the fact that my brother goes home on a Monday… and I don’t leave til Tuesday.  Which means I’ll be on my own for an entire day and night.  In a country I don’t know, around people I don’t know, speaking a language I don’t know.  Gulp.  I’m also kinda paranoid for Lola, walking around Houston makes me nervous and now I’m gonna heft it around countries overseas.  My dad seems to think people are just gonna cut my bag, grab it (and my cam in it) and run -is that as common as he says it is?  I would die if something happened to her.

But still, this is such a fantastic opportunity. My brother can actually afford to go and take care of me, so he’s basically covering most everything and I’m just gonna have to owe him my half…  basically for the rest of my life.  But, it’s as he said… how often do you get to go to Italy?!  (Well hopefully more than once. And hopefully next time I’ll come back with someone other than my brother.  As in, maybe with a boyfriend?  That would be romantic. Sigh.)

Now the next 2 and a half (or so) months need to hurry up and pass so I can GO!  To ITALY!  EEK!  Are we there yet?!

[I'm pre-empting my weekly project 365 recap post in favor of a post regarding my birthday.  I'll probably post the recap tomorrow.  Maybe.  Maybe not.  It IS my birthday after all. :)]

(Birthday card from Beth.. I LOVE it.)

I love birthdays.  I always have.  Sometimes I think that at this point in my life, I should be one of those who doesn’t say a thing or doesn’t make a big deal out it… but I can’t.  Even this year I wasn’t that excited because I figured it’d be a bust, but as the big day got closer, I got more and more excited.  That’s just the way I am.  And if you know me, you know that.  Last night I got a text from a friend, telling me the countdown to my birthday (1 hour and 55 minutes, at the time).  Now THAT’S someone who really gets me, especially considering that mere minutes earlier, I was tweeting the hours left of being 27.

That being said… I always get super excited about my birthday, only to have it be a bit of a letdown.  I’m not really sure what I expect from the day that I always feel like it doesn’t live up to what I wanted, ah well.

Oh and by the way… You gotta love that, thanks to facebook and other social networking sites, my birthday is the one day a year I hear from some people that I haven’t heard from in… well, a year.  It’s kind of nice and then at the same time it’s like, “thanks for the wishes, hear from ya again next year”.

Anyway, the day went well.   The other kindergarten teacher brought her kids into my room so that both classes could sing happy birthday to me… plus her kids made me little cards that they stuck on my door.

For lunch we went out to Subway and they gave me some Starbucks gift cards (shows how well they know me!), and one of them made all us teachers cupcakes.  A parent of one of my students brought cupcakes for the class, and I got a balloon.

[Sidebar: I'm sure none of you care what happened on my birthday.  But recently I discovered that I cannot, for the life of me, remember what I did a few birthdays ago (and no, it was not due to excessive alcohol) so I figure that by writing it down here, I'll be able to remember for the future.]

Then, in the evening I went to get dinner and drinks with a friend at TGI Fridays, which is like my go-to spot for birthday dinners.  Seriously, I went there last year, I went there when I turned 21… I’m sure there were a few more trips in between.

So all in all, not bad.  In fact, a pretty good way to spend a birthday.

Now I just need to get over tomorrow.  I always say that the day AFTER birthdays are depressing.  That’s when all the love, the facebook posts and tweets on twitter and random “happy birthdays!” go away. But after THAT… I’m 28.. .and feeling great!  And on that note, I think I’m stopping at 28 for a while.  I refuse to turn another year old when I don’t look like my age.  So I’m staying 28 for a few years. :)

So I had a work-related blog post planned for today.  But I just don’t want to think about work right now.  I’m tired.  And excited about the fact that I finally, officially have plans for Spring Break.  And more excited about the fact that those plans are going to visit my BFF Beth… in Alabama.

Yeah okay Spring Break in Alabama doesn’t really have a nice ring to it.  But I’ve always wanted to visit Beth because.. well, while she’s been my BFF for the last 5 years, I’ve never met her.  I kind of think BFFs should meet each other in person, no? :)  And while I’m at it, I’m hoping to knock 3 birds out with 1 stone and meet up with 2 other flickr contacts that live somewhat in the area.  (Although as I’m typing this, I’m already finding out from one that she might not be able to make it… sad.) I’m looking forward to a few days being out of my parents’ house, out of Texas and having some fun.

Anyway, it’s been something I had wanted to do for a while but finances were making it look impossible.  And then tickets suddenly dropped in price, and my mom helped out and… voila.

And that’s why I’m all smiley right now, after an exhausting day at work.  :)